Cat Got Your Tongue, Monica?

     The sky is blue, a Hot Pocket and Ramen noodles are perfect for lunch on a chilly day, and Monica Conyers is bad for Detroit…no news here.  Under the scrutinous eye of the public, however, Conyers never seemed to care much about the latter.  She didn’t care about what people thought or what they had heard spewed angrily from her mouth.  Oh, how she loved to compare public figures to beloved, green CGI ogres.  My, how she reveled in her astute observations of those requiring the aid of hearing devices and possible oncology care.  A true poster child for free speech, Monica always had something on her mind and somehow a forum to make it known.  After all, it’s just us.  Lil’ ol’ Detroit: the folks that have known her for a while now, who don’t question too much, who have blindly voted her and her name into power positions for years.  She’s the star of  our local, long-running sitcom “That’s Just Monica”, where she plays the wacky neighbor who just never seems to get it right.  She knows just how much she could say and just how much she can get away with.  Until now.  Imagine her chagrin when it’s the big dogs who wanna have a little chit-chat.   The Feds are familiar with our cast of characters, but have no interest in the hilarity and bumbling that ensues on a daily basis.  They want answers, and, by all accounts, are intent on getting them.  Why, I can almost hear her internal dialogue now.  “You mean, they don’t care who my husband is?  You mean, they’re actually checking my books, my numbers, my spending, and my decisions?  There are people out there who will not only discover some of the poor behavior I’ve managed to blow past my constituents, but hold me accountable?!  This is Detroit, don’t they know that?  They want to expose years of uninterrupted corruption is favor of…gulp…truth, honesty, and service to the thousands who have put the fate of their city in my hands?  THE NERVE!” 

     Y’know, I’m trying to be a more positive person, but I can’t help but feel the anticipation of Monica finally being laid to political rest.  I’m actually…happy…yes, happy she has nothing to say.  When reporters ask for details on the investigation and rumored plea deal, she simply replies that she can’t talk about it.  Can’t talk about it!  Ha ha ha!   Could this finally be it?  The proverbial sock to stuff that uninformed, abusive mouth of hers?  Did the long arm of, not only the law, but logic, morality, and accountability finally reach out to tap our corrupted council member on the shoulder?  Golly, I hope so.  And for all of our sakes, if  she’s found guilty of evil doings, I hope it’s not a mere tap, but a full-fledged spanking.